Excellent deep dive into a thorny topic May & you’ve used quotes from other standpoints to great effect so that your presentation of arguments is balanced.

I tend to land in the same camp as you in feeling that there is a place for fantasy but that if a scene is being portrayed as real then there is room to show precautions & protections being exercised as well as things not going to plan.

Only recently I wrote as a fictionalised a version of myself in a story & mentioned that ‘she’ thought sex was meant to be silent: my implication was that perception was shaped by what erotic passages she had read up to that point.

Enjoyed this opinion piece & the additional interest in reading the comments.